...Beautiful dReamer...

My schatzi...

2008-10-03T17:06:00.010+08:00

I miss him so damn much...everything!!! Wish u are here,my schatzi...

Blue Mood...

2008-09-26T17:50:00.005+08:00

Pain, you just have to ride it out, hope it goes away on its own, hope the wound that caused it heals. There are no solutions, no easy answers, you just breath deep and wait for it to subside. Most of the time pain can be managed but sometimes the pain gets you where you least expect it. Hits way below the belt and doesn't let up. Pain, you just have to fight through, because the truth is you can't outrun it and life always makes more.

...Dr Meredith Grey

Patience

2008-09-22T17:00:00.003+08:00

Sometimes struggles are exactly what we need in our lives. If God allowed us to go through our lives without any obstacles, it would cripple us. We would not be as strong as what we could have been. We could never fly!

I asked for Strength.........

And God gave me Difficulties to make me strong.

I asked for Wisdom.........

And God gave me Problems to solve.

I asked for Prosperity.........

And God gave me Brain and Brawn to work.

I asked for Courage.........

And God gave me Danger to overcome.

I asked for Love.........

And God gave me Troubled people to help.

I asked for Favors.........

And God gave me Opportunities.

I received nothing I wanted ........

I received everything I needed!

A Lesson In Life

2008-09-19T15:26:00.007+08:00

Sometimes people come into your life and you know right away that they were meant to be there, they serve some sort of purpose, to teach you a lesson or help figure out who you are or who you want to become. You never know who these people may be - your roommate, neighbor, professor, long lost friend, lover or even a complete stranger who, when you lock eyes with them, you know that very moment that they will affect your life in some profound way. And sometimes things happen to you and at the time they may seem horrible, painful and unfair, but in reflection you realize that without overcoming those obstacles, you would have never realized your potential, strength, will power or heart. Everything happens for a reason. Nothing happens by chance or by means of good or bad luck. Illness, injury, love, lost moments of true greatness and sheer stupidity - all occur to test the limits of your soul. Without these small tests, if they be events, illnesses or relationships, life would be like a smoothly paved, straight, flat road to nowhere. Safe and comfortable but dull and utterly pointless. The people you meet who affect your life and the successes and downfalls you experience - they are the ones who create who you are. Even the bad experiences can be learned from. Those lessons are the hardest and probably the most important ones. If someone hurts you, betrays you or breaks your heart, forgive them for they have helped you learn about trust and the importance of being cautious to whom you open your heart to. If someone loves you, love them back unconditionally, not only because they love you, but because they are teaching you to love and opening your heart and eyes to things you would have never seen or felt without them. Make every day count. Appreciate every moment and take from it everything that you possibly can, for you may never be able to experience it again. Talk to people you have never talked to before, and actually listen. Let yourself fall in love, break free and set your sights high. Hold your head up because you have every right to. Tell yourself you are a great individual and believe in yourself, for if you don't believe in yourself, no one else will believe in you either. You can make of your life anything you wish. Create your own life and then go out and live it. "People are like tea bags - you have to put them in hot water before you know how strong they are."

Got this beautiful meaningful article from one of my good friend, Farah...

Butterfly in my stomach!!

2008-09-15T17:10:00.010+08:00

You may of noticed that whenever you have butterflies in your stomach you're feeling nervous or excited. When you are nervous or excited organs just above your kidneys release a chemical messenger into your blood called adrenalin.
Humans have adrenalin because it helps protect ourselves from danger, back in ancient history cavemen would not be feeling nervous because they had a big exam, they would be feeling nervous because they thought something was going to eat them. The adrenalin helped them run away from or fight the thing they thought would eat them. When we have to run quickly or fight we need lots of blood to go to our muscles and other important organs, so the adrenalin sends most of the blood there and takes it away from the unimportant parts of the body, like your stomach. So when you get butterflies in the stomach, the funny feeling is caused by the blood going away from your stomach to your muscles.

It is normal for someone to get nervous whenever they are facing an uncomfortable social situation. It is easy to get butterflies in your stomach if you do not know how to cope with such situations. I am a person who always always got nervous whenever I had to present projects, or during Q&A sessions. I knew that presenting in public places was a big problem for me, so the easiest way to handle this is by practising speaking to myself in front of the mirror and pretend that nobody was staring at me. This is what all people taught me. This is what i keep telling myself..but i guess it did not work all the time. Sometimes yes it works,but sometimes..urgghhhh...too bad. If I could not communicate and make others understand my thoughts, this would become an obstacle to my work life. Am i right?

And now, guess what? This is how i felt today. I've got butterfly in my stomach!! Again!! Just because i agreed with Jaq to do the on stage performance on Hari Malaysia 2008. My task is quite simple. Just walk to the stage, and then share with the audience about "Ten good things you can tell your children about the Malays". There suppose to be 7 performers and I am the last one. Each one of us will share good things about different races. I'm not sure whether i can handle it or not. But what i can hope is, no silly things will happen on that day..which mean..tomorrow!!! 16 sEPT 2008. So, better be friend with mirror today!! This is 10 good things that i should memorize for tomorrow..Wish me luck ya!!

Ten good things you can tell your children about the Malays

1)They are gentle and peramah, the nicest people around

2)They make loyal, long time friends

3)They will share with you everything that they have; their food, their wealth, their power and their land

4)They are good neighbors, caring and sharing. Gotong royong is their middle name

5)They are artistic, cultured and sensitive

6)They are willing to compromise. Their leaders lead not just their own race but also all Malaysians

7)They know how to relax

8)They are easily won over – give them half a chance to make peace, they will grab it. Always giving in

9)They share with you the joys of Hari Raya Puasa

10)They make the best sambal belacan , sambal ikan kering & sambal petai in the world!

Tears are the proof of Life...

2008-08-22T09:50:00.004+08:00

"How long will the pain last?" a broken-hearted mourner asked me. "All the rest of your life." I had to answer truthfully. We never quite forget. No matter how many years pass, we remember. The loss of a loved one is like a major operation; part of us is removed, and we have a scar for the rest of our lives. This does not mean that the pain continues at the same intensity. There is a short while, at first, when we hardly believe it; it is rather like when we cut our hand. We see the blood flowing, but the pain has not set in yet. So when we are bereaved, there is a short while before the pain hits us. But when it does, it is massive in its effect. Grief is shattering. Then the wound begins to heal. It is like going through a dark tunnel. Occasionally we glimpse a bit of light up ahead, then we lose sight of it awhile, then see it again, and one day we merge into the light. We are able to laugh, to care, to live. The wound is healed so to speak. The stitches are taken out, and we are whole again. But not quite. The scar is still there, and the scar tissue, too. As the years go by, we manage. There are things to do, people to care for, and tasks that call for full attention. But the pain is still there, not far below the surface. We see a face that looks familiar, hear a voice that has echoes, see a photograph in someone's album, see a landscape that once we saw together, and it as though the knife were in the wound again. But not so painfully, and mixed with joy, too. Because remembering a happy time is not all sorrow; it brings back happiness with it. As a matter of fact, we even seek such moments in bittersweet remembrance. We have our religious memories and our memorial days, and our visits to the cemetery. And though these bring back the pain, they bring back memories of joy as well.
How long will the pain last? All the rest of you life. But the thing to remember is that not only the pain will last, but the blessed memories as well. Tears are the proof of life. The more love, the more tears. If this were true, then how could we ever ask that the pain cease altogether? For then the memory of love would go with it. The pain of grief is the price we pay for love.

(Author unknown)

Insecurities...

2008-08-21T12:20:00.005+08:00

It really hurts me. Really hurt when those old memories come back.When those old memories that we just found out keep spinning in our head and make us feel too bad. Too stupid..I couldn't breath for a while..i couldn't see anything good for a while...why they still coming back to me now?

And what a beautiful mess this is. It's like picking up trash in dresses...

Love letters...

2008-08-20T11:03:00.009+08:00

Letter 1

July 6, in the morning

My angel, my all, my very self -
Only a few words today and at that with pencil (with yours) - Not till tomorrow will my lodgings be definitely determined upon - what a useless waste of time - Why this deep sorrow when necessity speaks - can our love endure except through sacrifices, through not demanding everything from one another; can you change the fact that you are not wholly mine, I not wholly thine - Oh God, look out into the beauties of nature and comfort your heart with that which must be - Love demands everything and that very justly - thus it is to me with you, and to you with me. But you forget so easily that I must live for me and for you; if we were wholly united you would feel the pain of it as little as I - My journey was a fearful one; I did not reach here until 4 o'clock yesterday morning. Lacking horses the post-coach chose another route, but what an awful one; at the stage before the last I was warned not to travel at night; I was made fearful of a forest, but that only made me the more eager - and I was wrong. The coach must needs break down on the wretched road, a bottomless mud road. Without such postilions as I had with me I should have remained stuck in the road. Esterhazy, traveling the usual road here, had the same fate with eight horses that I had with four - Yet I got some pleasure out of it, as I always do when I successfully overcome difficulties - Now a quick change to things internal from things external. We shall surely see each other soon; moreover, today I cannot share with you the thoughts I have had during these last few days touching my own life - If our hearts were always close together, I would have none of these. My heart is full of so many things to say to you - ah - there are moments when I feel that speech amounts to nothing at all - Cheer up - remain my true, my only treasure, my all as I am yours. The gods must send us the rest, what for us must and shall be -
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Letter 2
July 6, Evening, Monday

You are suffering, my dearest creature - only now have I learned that letters must be posted very early in the morning on Mondays to Thursdays - the only days on which the mail-coach goes from here to K. - You are suffering - Ah, wherever I am, there you are also - I will arrange it with you and me that I can live with you. What a life!!! thus!!! without you - pursued by the goodness of mankind hither and thither - which I as little want to deserve as I deserve it - Humility of man towards man - it pains me - and when I consider myself in relation to the universe, what am I and what is He - whom we call the greatest - and yet - herein lies the divine in man - I weep when I reflect that you will probably not receive the first report from me until Saturday - Much as you love me - I love you more - But do not ever conceal yourself from me - good night - As I am taking the baths I must go to bed - Oh God - so near! so far! Is not our love truly a heavenly structure, and also as firm as the vault of heaven?
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Letter 3
Good morning, on July 7

Though still in bed, my thoughts go out to you, my Immortal Beloved, now and then joyfully, then sadly, waiting to learn whether or not fate will hear us - I can live only wholly with you or not at all - Yes, I am resolved to wander so long away from you until I can fly to your arms and say that I am really at home with you, and can send my soul enwrapped in you into the land of spirits - Yes, unhappily it must be so - You will be the more contained since you know my fidelity to you. No one else can ever possess my heart - never - never - Oh God, why must one be parted from one whom one so loves. And yet my life in V is now a wretched life - Your love makes me at once the happiest and the unhappiest of men - At my age I need a steady, quiet life - can that be so in our connection? My angel, I have just been told that the mailcoach goes every day - therefore I must close at once so that you may receive the letter at once - Be calm, only by a calm consideration of our existence can we achieve our purpose to live together - Be calm - love me - today - yesterday - what tearful longings for you - you - you - my life - my all - farewell. Oh continue to love me - never misjudge the most faithful heart of your beloved.
ever thine
ever mine
ever ours.

10 things I hate about you

2008-07-28T11:07:00.002+08:00

I hate the way you talk to me

And the way you cut your hair

I hate the way you drive my car

I hate it when you stare
I hate your big dumb combat boots

And the way you read my mind

I hate you so much that it makes me sick

It even makes me rhyme
I hate the way you're always right

I hate it when you lie

I hate it when you make me laugh

Even worse when you make me cry
I hate the way you're not around

And the fact that you didn't call

But mostly I hate the way I don't hate you

Not even close, not even a little bit, not even at all.

The Final Analysis...

2008-06-10T15:43:00.000+08:00

The Final Analysis

People are often unreasonable, illogical and self-centered

Forgive them anyway

If you are kind, people may accuse you of selfish, ulterior motives;

Be kind anyway.

If you are successful, you will win some false friends and some true enemies;

Succeed anyway.

If you are honest and frank, people may cheat you;

Be honest and frank anyway.

What you spend years building, someone may destroy overnight;

Build anyway.

If you find serenity and happiness, they may be jealous;

Be happy anyway.

The good you do today, people will often forget tomorrow;

Do good anyway.

Give the world the best you have, and it may never be enough;

Give the world the best you've got anyway.

You see, in the final analysis, it is all between you and God;

It was never between you and them anyway.

I feel bad too...

2008-05-22T17:58:00.000+08:00

Chelsea lose to Man U... i feel bad too,my dear... is it Avram fault this time?

Ermmhh....

share some quotes about love...

2008-05-21T14:59:00.000+08:00

Love is patient, love is kind.

It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud.

It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered,

it keeps no record of wrongs.
Love does not delight in evilbut rejoices with the truth.
It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.
Love never fails..

It's easy to say 'I love you', but it's more meaningful to thank someone for loving you. -Bon Jovi

Love is not something you have. It's something you do. -Nick Carter

As long as there is you, there is laughter, whispered secrets, long, quiet moments, tender talk. ..as long as there is you, there is love.

You know you're in love when your life is better than your dreams.

Don't fall in love with some you can live with. Fall in love with someone that you can't live without.

You know you truly love someone when everyday you meet is like the first time you fall in love.

I loved you once; I love you still. I always have, I always will.

Like dexter without his lab, like spongebob without his pants, like shaggy with out scooby-doo im just nothing with out you.

Someone once asked me what I saw in him.My only answer was everything...

p/s: I love these quotes...very much!

What's his name hidden meaning...

2008-05-07T13:06:00.000+08:00

You are usually the best at everything ... you strive for perfection. You are confident, authoritative, and aggressive. You have the classic "Type A" personality.You are full of energy. You are spirited and boisterous.You are bold and daring. You are willing to do some pretty outrageous things.Your high energy sometimes gets you in trouble. You can have a pretty bad temper at times.You are balanced, orderly, and organized. You like your ducks in a row.You are powerful and competent, especially in the workplace.People can see you as stubborn and headstrong. You definitely have a dominant personality.You are a very lucky person. Things just always seem to go your way.And because you're so lucky, you don't really have a lot of worries. You just hope for the best in life.You're sometimes a little guilty of being greedy. Spread your luck around a little to people who need it.You are relaxed, chill, and very likely to go with the flow.You are light hearted and accepting. You don't get worked up easily.Well adjusted and incredibly happy, many people wonder what your secret to life is.You are confident, self assured, and capable. You are not easily intimidated.You master any and all skills easily. You don't have to work hard for what you want.You make your life out to be exactly how you want it. And you'll knock down anyone who gets in your way!You are very intuitive and wise. You understand the world better than most people.You also have a very active imagination. You often get carried away with your thoughts.You are prone to a little paranoia and jealousy. You sometimes go overboard in interpreting signals.You are loving, compassionate, and ruled by your feelings.You are able to be a foundation for other people... but you still know how to have fun.Sometimes your emotions weigh you down, but you generally feel free from them.

What's my name hidden meaning...

2008-05-07T12:59:00.000+08:00

You are fair, honest, and logical. You are a natural leader, and people respect you.You never give up, and you will succeed... even if it takes you a hundred tries.You are rational enough to see every part of a problem. You are great at giving other people advice.You are friendly, charming, and warm. You get along with almost everyone.You work hard not to rock the boat. Your easy going attitude brings people together.At times, you can be a little flaky and irresponsible. But for the important things, you pull it together.You are the total package - suave, sexy, smart, and strong.You have the whole world under your spell, and you can influence almost everyone you know.You don't always resist your urges to crush the weak. Just remember, they don't have as much going for them as you do.You tend to be pretty tightly wound. It's easy to get you excited... which can be a good or bad thing.You have a lot of enthusiasm, but it fades rather quickly. You don't stick with any one thing for very long.You have the drive to accomplish a lot in a short amount of time. Your biggest problem is making sure you finish the projects you start.You are very charming... dangerously so. You have the potential to break a lot of hearts.You know how what you want, how to get it, and that you will get it.You have the power to rule the world. Let's hope you're a benevolent dictator!You are usually the best at everything ... you strive for perfection. You are confident, authoritative, and aggressive. You have the classic "Type A" personality.You are very intuitive and wise. You understand the world better than most people.You also have a very active imagination. You often get carried away with your thoughts.You are prone to a little paranoia and jealousy. You sometimes go overboard in interpreting signals.

What did YOU learn today?

2008-05-02T15:34:00.000+08:00

A day when I do not learn something is a day lost.

On every day that deserves to be called a day, I have learned something.

Today I learned that cats are aware of the time that passes.

What did YOU learn today?

What did I learn today?

Edited the flowers images which I just did for this blog..wink!! By using Snag It!!

Guess what? i'm happy with what I have learned today.heheh...

Beautiful dreamer...

2008-04-25T17:36:00.000+08:00

Beautiful dreamer, wake unto me,

Starlight and dewdrops are waiting for thee;

Sounds of the rude world heard in the day,

Lull'd by the moonlight have all pass'd away!

Beautiful dreamer, queen of my song,

List while I woo thee with soft melody;

Gone are the cares of life's busy throng.

Beautiful dreamer, awake unto me!

Beautiful dreamer, out on the sea,

Mermaids are chaunting the wild lorelie;

Over the streamlet vapors are borne,

Waiting to fade at the bright coming morn.

Beautiful dreamer, beam on my heart,

E'en as the morn on the streamlet and sea;

Then will all clouds of sorrow depart,

Beautiful dreamer, awake unto me!

Beautiful Dreamer a poem by Stephen Foster

Alohaa...

2008-04-25T09:54:00.000+08:00

My second post..I really love my blog rite now..very simple but nice to see.. let just say..I did it!! I hope that I can do it better..better than before..ermhh....I've got a lot of ideas.. running in my head right now...just don't know which one should I pull out first...never mind...anything will be fine right?How about dreams? I've got many dreams actually....the beautiful one....suitable for me..as a beautiful dreamer..heheh..but anyway...let just talk about my first blog..'my first piece of art'...Love Begins with a Kiss, Life Ends with Tears Beautiful article..I got it from my friend's friends' blog actually...curik!! heheh.. It's a great article..the words are so beautiful..meaningful... i did read it before..a long long time ago...not as a full article but most of the phrase I found it somewhere but I don't remember where and when...and now when i read it all over again...ermhh...I was touched again! made me feel like crying...huhuhu..but i hope you guys..whoever visits my blog..will feel the same way too..life is too short! Find your love..your true love..I'm in love right now..and i hope this is my true love..my first and my forever love..my destiny...my future...and when all my things (you know..every single things that i did for myself only) unites with you my darling..then all my dreams will comes true..can't wait to see that happen...good luck to myself!! and all the best for you too!!!

My first piece of art..

2008-04-24T17:33:00.001+08:00

Love Begins with a Kiss, Life Ends with Tears

It's true that we don't know what we've got until we lose it, but it's also true that we don't know what we've been missing until it arrives. It's better to lose your pride to the one you love, than to lose the one you love because of pride. Don't cry over anyone who won't cry over you.
What do you do when the only person that can stop you crying, is the person that made you cry? It hurts to love someone and not to be loved in return. But what is more painful is to love someone and never find the courage to let that person know how you feel. Maybe God wants us to meet a few wrong people before meeting the right one so that when we finally do meet the right person, we will know how to be grateful for that gift.
We spend so much time looking for the right person to love or finding fault with those we already love, when instead, we should be perfecting the love we give. Some thoughts are better left unsaid, some feelings are better left kept to yourself, but love has its way of expressing itself despite the silence
When you truly care for someone, you don't look for faults... you don't look for answers, you don't look for mistakes. Instead, you fight the mistakes, you accept the faults, and you overlook excuses. The measure of love is when you love without measure . In life, there are certain things we want our partner to do but we fail in it. If you are right keep trying to let get your goal if it is not selfishness. But still you fail, try again. If the thing important to you isn’t important to the other you love, that is not love because if she loves you, she will accept what you like and if it is fair.
Giving someone all your love is never an assurance that they will love you back. Don't expect love in return, just wait for it to grow in their hearts; but if it doesn't, be content that it grew in yours. It takes a minute to have a crush on someone, an hour to like someone and a day to love someone - but it takes a lifetime to forget someone.
Love comes to those who still hope even though they've been disappointed ; to those who still believe even though they've been betrayed; to those who still need love even though they've been hurt before. But do care that you’re not disappointing your love again and again because there are more chances to have less in the feelings. The beginning of love is to let those we love be perfectly themselves, and not twist them with our own image - otherwise, we love only our own reflection of ourselves that we find in them.
You cannot finish a book without closing its chapters. If you want to go on, then you have to leave your past as you turn the pages of life. Dream what you want to dream, go where you want to go; be what you want to be, because you have only one life and one chance to do all the things you want to do. But when you start a new chapter, look to start with new things and the things one another want to see and feel. Otherwise the same old chapters will damage the love more and it will be more painful than the yesterday.
Never say goodbye when you still want to try - never give up when you still feel you can take it - never say you don't love that person anymore when you don't really want to let go. Friendship beings with a smile, The brightest; future will always be based on forgotten past. You can't get on well in life until you let go of your past failures and headaches.
Besides all these things, One thing is most important that do we care about each other feeling ? Do we do what our soul mate wants ? Do we correct our mistakes after realizing our mistakes ? If NO – That is not love ! and if it is not love, It’s an End ! Everything is ok in the end; If it's not ok it's not the end.